in brief: embarrassment





i have a long memory for embarrassment. it is so long, in fact, that embarrassing things that took place years ago can make me grumble and shake my head in public, forcefully and without warning, walking down the street like a crazy hobo. they're mostly mundane things--moments that make for boring stories--but still they nag at me like little, skipping demons. this feeling must be fairly common.

what occurs to me most often? here are the greatest hits of my life so far:

-using the word "indignance" instead of "indignation" in front of my favorite professor in college

-calling an unpopular girl a "fag" behind her back in the seventh grade, failing to realize not only the ugliness of that word but also that calling a girl a "fag" doesn't make any sense

-visible sweatpits (various instances)

-the day in fifth grade when i wore my sister's acne prescription foundation

-mispronouncing "episcopal" for the duration of a presentation when i was twelve

-that one time when i insisted the film "the princess bride" was based on the book "the once and future king" for about two days

ridiculous, i know.
but surely everybody has things like these?